Up The Middle

mood: thirsty

music: "Stardog Champion" Mother Love Bone

I have now fallen victim to a poorly written internet recipe. I have cooked a lot, and i mean A LOT, of recipes including various cajun and indian ones but tonight i did indeed make the hottest sauce EVA! It all started when i found a basil cream chicken recipe on the net and thought ymmmmmmm. Well it called for a 1/4 cup roasted red pepper in the sauce. Now before you say "i could have told you that was a bad idea"- a) you know how you'll periodically deftly follow a new recipes measurements without considering the ingredient and b) i have made recipes with "hot" ingredients before and usually they moderate after cooking. Not the case here. I went through three beers for a twenty minute meal. My eyes watered, my sinuses cleared. I feel like i should have won some kind of award for eating it (couldn't let the chicken go to waste after i sauced it). It was that hot, i sucked on a lemon afterwards to keep my head from bursting into flame. My spice intolerant girlfriend licked an index finger full after being warned and nearly had a coronary. She snatched the cranberry juice out of the frig and chugged it.

This sauce should be used for capital punishment. I really enjoy spicey foods but i couldn't even handle that. I can't imagine what else the recipe could have meant by red pepper- if it was supposed to be bell they should have stated such- but i don't know anything about roasted bell pepper in a sauce and i don't think fresh red pepper would have made much difference And if it was meant to be that hot they should put some kind of warning on the damn recipe! Needless to say the sauce ended up being poured unceremoniously down the garbage disposal. I have never eaten anything that fucking hot in my life....

But hey the chicken was delicious!